3
May
2008

Marvin Harrison: A Conspiracy Theory

Posted by Dustin Hockensmith

Seeing as details for the shooting incident involving Colts wide receiver Marvin Harrison are so hazy, now is a great time to run wild with imagination. By the time next week rolls around, facts will be released and we’ll learn exactly what Harrison’s role - if any - was in the shooting.

Until then, we can feel free to theorize. Did a parking lot fight escalate into Harrison using a weapon? Did Harrison, still recovering from offseason knee surgery, fire the gun in self defense? Or, were the alleged victims attempting to extort or frame Harrison?

Fascinating and shocking stuff, no matter what the real story is.

The facts of the case:
1.) Harrison claims that his Belgian handgun never let his Philadelphia home.
2.) One of the alleged victims coaxed Harrison into a fist fight.
3.) Before Harrison walked out of his bar, Playmakers, there has been no account of his grabbing any weapon.
4.) A full seven shots were fired, and the gun was stashed in a trash can at Harrison’s nearby car wash.
5.) Of the seven rounds that were emptied, only one struck the victim and it was in a non-fatal part of his body - his hand.
6.) A two-year old boy was injured when a stray bullet went through a windshield. He may or may not have witnessed the altercation.
7.) The gunshot victim failed to identify a shooter to police.
8.) Harrison’s agent Tom Condon told ESPN’s Chris Mortensen that preliminary reports of his involvement are “erroneous.”

Here is one conspiracy theory, which I whole-heartedly expect to be proven wrong by Monday.

At least two gentlemen, local guys that know of Harrison’s quick temper off the field, stake out Harrison’s home. When Harrison leaves to tend to some business at his bar, Playmakers, one of the men breaks into the house and walks out with his Belgian handgun.

One hour later, the alleged victim walks into Playmakers - around 5 p.m. on Tuesday - and stages an argument with Harrison. Not wanting to make a scene in his own establishment, Harrison asks him to step outside and settle the issue.

Meanwhile, the second accomplice had made his way to Playmakers with the weapon. It is stashed in the trunk of the alleged victim’s car.

The victim is successful in engaging Harrison in an altercation. Either he or his accomplice, not Harrison, pulls out the weapon and fires seven shots, including one that struck the victim’s hand.

Everyone flees the scene quickly, and police, caught up in a murder case, are slow in response. By this time, Harrison had left Playmakers and gone to his car wash, where the gun had already been planted.

Police arrive and do a preliminary investigation into the crime. Details are released three days later, and a national news story is created.

Outlandish perhaps, but if some of those facts are incorrect, Harrison could be in some deep trouble. He made the claim that the weapon never left his home, so if it turns out that the gun was, in fact, on him, he has a great deal of explaining to do.

Regardless, ESPN’s John Clayton described the NFL’s gun policy, and Harrison could still be facing a misdemeanor charge. Check out the full ESPN story here.

In other NFL news …
Out of the “Stating the Obvious But Making Headlines Because He’s an ESPN Personality” Department, Emmitt Smith thinks new Cowboys cornerback Pacman Jones should stay out of trouble. Groundbreaking advice from Smith, who suddenly cares about Jones’ well-being because it affects his former employer.

Denver Broncos quarterback Jay Cutler was diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes, the Associated Press reported on Friday. Cutler summed it up best when he said, “I’m not the first athlete to get diabetes and I won’t be the last.” Cutler is a mature 25-year old, and the disease won’t affect his play on the field. There should be no change in the expectation that he’ll be among the NFL’s most productive quarterbacks in 2008.

More opinions on Harrison …
Harrison was the last person The Orange Squeeze would associate with a crime like this.

British news source Tardis discusses perhaps the most shocking detail in the case - the shooting involved a gun.

Fantasy Football Mastermind has this story and a bundle of other news.

Dustin Hockensmith is editor of ImaginaryGridiron.com. He can be contacted at dhockensmith[at]fantasysports101.net.

Comments

  1. Yeah…Something tells me that isn’t what happened. Interesting though…Is this the horror movie sequel to O.J Simpson.

     
  2. Dustin Hockensmith (May 4th, 2008 at 5:31 pm)

    Yeah, probably not. If this is really what happened, though, I’m going to start posting under the name “Columbo.”

    – “This Columbo, he pretend to be stupid, but he’s really smart as a tack.” — Rob Schneider as Nazo, Big Daddy

     

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